Monday, October 14, 2013
Blog Intro Post
Sports acrobatics have been a big part of my life. I started acrobatics at age 6 at a local gym called Emilia's Acrobatics and Gymnastics Club (EAGC). I competed with two other girls that were my trio. I was fortunate enough to be able to compete in a international competition in Switzerland. Sports acrobatics teaches you dedication, perseverance, and many life lessons. I believe that acrobatics has helped me be the person I am today.
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I love the first picture it looks so cool!!
ReplyDeleteYour photos of acrobatics makes me want to go watch videos of live performances. I also think it is very cool how you went to Switzerland that is one of my favorite countries.
ReplyDeleteThat really takes a lot of skill.
ReplyDeleteGreat story! It's really cool how you were able to go to Switzerland.Nice pictures by the way.
ReplyDeleteThe first picture posted is sick and amazing, then doing it when your younger is even more impressive.
ReplyDeleteI think your pictures are really great! They’re so interesting and authentic.
ReplyDelete1. I think your topic sentence is fine, but I believe it should be” because it is a very unique sport.”
ReplyDelete2. You have good support- the visuals were very helpful as well.
3. You transitioned well from one paragraph to the next.
4. Your quote is good (as well as your citation), but maybe have a sentence after it that talks about people’s bodies and how they use them as apparatus, then go into “Also sports acrobatics has many different types of groups…”
5. A few grammatical errors so go back and proofread.
6. Right now, your argument is pretty good. I think if you offer a little more support your argument will be stronger. Stronger language would help as well.
7. Your post is interesting and it’s organized well. The pictures were a great idea, they really helped to emphasize your point and give the reader background into what sports acrobatics is.
8. A little more support, be passionate about what you’re arguing for and possibly have a different concluding sentence that really sums up what you’re saying. Good job!
Topic- Really good topic and I do gymnastics so I agree with you.
ReplyDeletesupport- I like the support you used and really good but i think you can us more on what you are talking about.
transitions- I don't really see a lot of them in the paragraph.
quote- I don't see no quotes
Grammera and spelling- really good grammar i don't see no era and spelling really good.
strong argument- It is really strong argument and its a good topic to talk about.
commet- I like the topic you pick and it is really put together and it look good so far.
suggest- make sure you put a quite sandwich and more transitions words and more example.